* what if i need you

[Ryan Evans]

Ryan waited in silence, it seemed like forever, the seconds were dragging by like years and he hated every moment of it.Her hand suddenly pushed his away from her leg, his eyes looked up to her as she didnt speak a word, she stood up shut everything off in the kitchen and just went outside.Silence? she was giving him silence? he never thought that it could hurt more than words, but it did.He stood up, watched her leave the house..the rain pounding to the ground like bullets, he grabbed his jacket and ran after her "martha!" he shouted, walking over to her, putting the jacket around her shoulders "dont stand out here like this you're going to freeze, c'mon lets go inside, in the warmth...we can talk about this...please" he begged.

[/blockquote]

[Ms. Martha Evans]

martha looked him and shrugged out of his jacket. why? that one word was all she had to say. she just wanted to know why about everything. she wasnt going to go inside. she couldnt. it was then tears started to stream down her face. mixing in with the raindrops. maybe he wont notice her make up running.

[Ryan Evans]

"why?" he questioned, his hands catching the jacket that she shrugged off, he sighed and tried to put it back over her shoulders, he stood in front of her and wiped the tears away from her face with his thumb, not that it made much difference because of the rain, but still, he wanted to show her some kind of affection, he hated seeing her upset, he loved her."it just..." he paused "happened.." he then bit his lower lip "and im not going to give you the same old bullshit, it meant nothing..i was thinking of you the whole time, because you know im not cliche like that" he got angry with himself, clenching his fist together as the rain dripped through his hair and down his face "i just....i dont know, i missed you...and she told me those things..i fell into some sort of trap...black hole or whatever and well we kissed...but...that was it, it was one kiss" he said apologetically.

[/blockquote]

[Ms. Martha Evans]

martha shook her head and took a step back. she again shrugged out of his jacket. "you know all her games ryan! you know what she can do....and you still fell for it....again! she shook her head once more and over to the picnic table and sat on the table with her feet on the bench. i guess its a good thing he never asked me to marry him. she thought to her self

[Ryan Evans]

Ryan watched as she shrugged off his jacket a second time, it fell to the ground but he didnt take his eyes off of martha.As she stepped backwards he stepped forwards "i know, i know...and im a fucking idiot...i know i am" he admitted "but all the blame shouldnt go on ashley, it was me too, im not going to be childish and push everything on her like that.." he added "but martha, you have to believe me when i say i love you...i love you more than life, you mean everything to me and i dont want to see everything we've worked so hard for just crumble...it shouldnt be like that, please dont let it be like that" he begged as he followed her to the picnic table.

[/blockquote]

[Ms. Martha Evans]

martha looked at him deep into his eyes. i need to know if its over. because i would leave you alone. she didnt bother wiping her tears away. she just let them fall as she began to cry harder. it was really hard for her to believe that he loved her.

[Ryan Evans]

He was confused , his eyes met hers and his heart pounded against his chest, the hurt in her eyes made him so sad "if what is over?" he hated to ask, he didnt want her to say them."us?" he asked, his voice shaking a little as he fought back getting upset.

[/blockquote]

[Ms. Martha Evans]

martha was crying hard than ever now, but she still kept her voice level and didnt raise it once. "yes. us. are we over? and this....this is all up to you." she put her wet, now straight hair, up in a high messy bun at the top of her head. something she always did when she was nervous.

[Ryan Evans]

Ryan was even more confused than ever, his head was spinning and he could feel tears stinging in his eyes trying to force their way out."you're giving me the option?" he asked "after im the one that hurt you?" he raised another question, why was this woman so perfect? it made things so much harder "of course i dont want us to be over, you are the love of my life...and i know i messed up but i want to make it up to you, i want to show you that you mean the world to me" he took a step forward, grabbed onto her hand and looked into her eyes, tears now surfacing in his "when im not with you it hurts me...and when you smile...i smile, right now..im crying because you're upset" he said as a tear rolled down his cheek "i love you martha cox".

[/blockquote]

[Ms. Martha Evans]

martha was powerless. he had this effect on her that made her melt when ever she looked at him. "then why did you do it? why didnt you think of me?" she felt defeated in so many ways. she just wasnt strong. "besides, im giving you the option, becuase you are the one that cheated.....so it makes sence if you want out of this. i dont blame you."